Spiritual Wisdom from My Students

One of the first “Aha” moments I experienced in the classroom was when I realized that I could learn as much from the students as they could learn from me.  The entire teacher/student paradigm gets flipped as I watch, listen and try to understand my students.  After 10 years of teaching, I still remind myself of this.  This awareness brings a wonder back into my classroom.  As the school year goes on and the “Groundhog Days” happen, where the days can seem the same, this idea keeps me excited about the many gifts my students bring to the classroom every day.

As I reflect on this, I realize that some of the most inspiring and memorable moments are the spiritual lessons I learn from my students.  I will briefly relate two of these stories in this post and more later.  If you have any stories to share, please put them in the comments section or email them to me if you want to share them privately.

1.       Rose was a student who was extremely bright.  When the school year started, every day she would diligently complete her work and come to me and ask for extra math work.  I would give her math drills, word problems and enrichment exercises and she would happily smile. Then, one day I looked at her and said, “Rose, it is so good to see how much you love math.”  She looked surprised and said, “On no, math is my weakest subject.  So this summer, I told myself I would work really hard on math, taking every chance I got, so I could turn it into my best subject.”  She succeeded and it did not take long.  She was soon the best math student I had. 

In life, I find that I shy away from things that I do not think that I am good at.  But Rose demonstrated that by diving in and putting some extra effort into an area where I need to grow, I will succeed.  I still need to remind myself of this when I am confronted, almost daily, with areas in life that I shy away from instead of embracing.  Yesterday, my son said, “Daddy, come draw with me.”  I said, “I am not a good artist, I am more of a musician.”  But, I have said this a thousand times and I caught myself this time.  Instead, I sat down, grabbed a crayon and completed a self-portrait, enjoying every second.

One friend talks about “leaning into the pain.”  This is not a masochistic notion, it simply means realizing that when we do not want to do something and go ahead and do it anyway, we get stronger by working through the pain and taking action.

2.      One day in class, I overheard two students talking and one said, “I only got a 96 on that test, but you got a 100.”  The other student said, “My Dad always says, ‘Compare equals despair.’ So, let’s both be happy we got A’s.”  I loved that and asked the student to share that with the class.  After he shared, another student said, “I get it, if I tell another student what grade I got on a test, either I am going to feel bad or they will.”  I thought about this concept as it applies to our adult lives. 

Here is an example: I can be in a good mood and pull up to a red light and see a new, shiny car next to me.  Sometime I catch myself thinking, “That car looks so good, I wish I had that car.  That person looks so happy in that car.  They have it so much better than me.”  This thinking can snowball and go on and so on until my mood is not so great anymore, unless I aware of it and gently remind myself that “Compare does equal despair.”

This works on many levels. When I compare my insides with your outsides, I always lose.  I also realize that I don’t necessarily want that new, shiny car, but I want the feeling I think the new car will bring me.   It will only bring that feeling temporarily.  When I make this realization, I can then let it go and maybe even do a quick gratitude list about what I am grateful I have, like having an older car that is paid off. 

I once read, “Most unhappiness comes from comparing yourself to others.”  I do agree.  This week, my students had the spelling word, priceless.  When I was asked to explain it, I said, “Peace of mind is priceless.”  When I don’t compare myself to others, I do have much more peace of mind.

Here is a quote to end this blog:

“If you are depressed you are living in the past.

If you are anxious you are living in the future. 
If you are at peace you are living in the present.”

- Lao Tzu